s****y
发帖数: 1574 | 1 All of us at Kidpower, in each of our Centers around the world, join
countless others in mourning the loss of the children and adults in Friday's
shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary. We are asking hard questions that have
complex answers.
And we are holding the children in our lives even more closely right now,
cherishing them, and longing to give them a safer world in which to live.
While you may have had the conversation about what happened at Sandy Hook
Elementary with the children you care about, be aware that details are still
unfolding on the news and children may talk about it at school on Monday.
They may not have had the information on Friday that they learned over the
weekend. Children might well hear scary details, often inaccurate, about
what happened from other kids at school or other group activities. Check in
with kids when they come home from school today.
As children hear more details about this tragedy, they may feel worried and
scared. Kids need our support and our love, not our own anxiety, grief, rage
, and fear.
Here are a few steps you can take right away:
1. Shield children as best you can. Seeing and hearing about horrific
events is traumatizing for people at any age. The response to traumatic
events often continues long after the tragedy itself.
Try to protect children from hearing or seeing news reports about tragic
events like this one. Turn off the radio in the car when experts are
analyzing what happened even if your child seems to be involved doing
something else in the back seat. Turn off your favorite news show on TV when
your kids are in the room. Unless there is an immediate emergency where you
must know what is happening for your family's safety, getting the news can
wait.
Interrupt friends, colleagues, parents, teachers, or other adults who start
to express their feelings about what happened when children are around by
saying, "Excuse me. Let's make a different time to talk about this." Then,
change the subject.
2. Acknowledge children's feelings without burdening them with your own. Let
them tell you their feelings and respond with compassionate, acknowledging
statements. "Yes, this is very sad. Yes, this is scary."
How YOU act is going to make a big difference in the impact on your children
. No matter how you feel inside, take a breath and decide to stay calm and
hopeful in front of your kids, projecting the messages that they are safe
and everything is in control. Get support for your own upset and overwhelmed
feelings with other adults in settings away from your kids. Remember that
your children can overhear your conversations even if you are on the
telephone in another part of the room, and they seem to be playing and not
paying attention.
Think carefully before bringing children to memorials and vigils where
adults are actively grieving. For children who are very aware of what
happened and feel sad, you can help them express their feelings through
listening to them, encouraging them to make drawings about their feelings,
and telling hopeful stories about dealing with different kinds of loss.
3. Answer questions in reassuring, age-appropriate ways. For younger
children, keep it very simple: "This almost never happens. The person who
did this won't be able to do it again. We are all working together to make
sure your school is safe." The articles below provide answers to more
complicated questions that might be troubling older children.
4. Give extra love and attention. Raise the issue if you think your child
has heard about it and watch for signals that your child might be worrying
and not telling you. Remember that kids, like many adults, often do not
express upset feelings directly and might regress, be irritable, whiny,
clingy, or demanding instead.
Even if a child doesn't seem troubled, spend extra time with your kids over
the next few days, having fun being together, listening to what they tell
you, noticing any changes in behavior, and giving extra reassurance about
any kind of worries, no matter how small.
Some children will not seem to be affected at first but will start to think
about what happened and become increasingly upset about it over time. They
might seem fine and then suddenly be afraid to go back to school after the
holidays. Seek professional help if a child shows signs of lasting anxiety.
We urge you to share the following articles with any adults with children in
their lives who may have worries and questions, to help young people
regain their emotional safety in the wake of this tragedy.
(see comments below for the links) |
